Monday, 18 July 2016

When You Hurt Yourself Over Being Hurt

So often we can blame ourselves for thinking there is something wrong with us or that it is our fault when someone hurts us.

Honestly THIS played a part in what drove my eating disorder and cutting. When my friends ran away from me during break times at high school, if a friend hurt me or a guy I was interested in ended up choosing someone else or did something that hurt me or if someone hurt me in general it was because "it was my fault, I wasn't good enough, I was a disgusting worthless piece of shit" it drove the demon in mind, it drove the urges to restrict, to cut and to hate myself even more than I did.  

Overtime I've come to realise that if someone mistreats and hurts you intentionally it's more to do with them than it has anything to do with you, it's a reflection of their character and not yours. To be able to see that and to recognise that is at times really hard but also eye opening and well sometimes people unintentionally hurt you (like we all do to others at times) and yet that still doesn't really have much to do with you either. I think at times we all need to have this reminder including me and to take our pain and put into a healthy outlet.

Please don't stop being you openly and freely because it is beautiful, you are beautiful and the world needs more of it.

With magic from me to you
Rainbow 🌈